Alreet there lads n’ lasses. 2005 is here and we find the Toon somewhat struggling do we not? 12th at the time of writing is not what we had in mind at the start of the season for sure. And I for one felt sure that Souness could be the man to break our trophy duck. Of course, that may still happen with the draws for both FA and UEFA Cups definitely falling into the “could have been worse” category.

Speaking of our FA Cup run so far, just what exactly is it about the national press when we get drawn against the minnows in the FA Cup. It was the same when we played Stevenage a few years ago. National newspapers sponsoring our opponents’ kits (they ended up with sponsors front AND back this time), and the whole of the media adopting that patronising “isn’t this lovely, aren’t we all having a good time, oh look the fans are singing, that number 8’s a DJ at the local public house don’t you know” kind of attitude. Well I’m here to tell you, it sucks!

Hey, I’m all for a bit of the “romance” of the cup. Of course. It’s nice. But for the love of Liam O’Brien do we really need the whole country to be so obviously against us? The commentary team nearly wept when Lee Bowyer scored, and you could hear the nooses being tightened when big Shola wrapped it up.

And as for the constant, “… and the home fans will enjoy this no matter what” statements, I’ve got to tell you that I’m convinced that’s nonsense. Come on folks. How many football fans do you really know who still really enjoy a game that their team lost because, well, you weren’t expected to win and … well … it was a good game?!?!? Exactly. They want their team to win every bit as much as we want the Toon to win and that’s fine. So please give it a rest.

Where to next? Oh yes. Neale Barry. Look. I surely cannot be the only Toon fan who thinks that Neale Barry’s failure to send off the West Brom player in our 0-0 draw was as bad a decision as the non-allowance of the Roy Carole clanger against Spurs this month?? I’m not suggesting that this necessarily affected the result or alters the fact that the Toon didn’t play all that well, but the facts remain. The lad had already been booked when he and Ollie Bernard went for a 50-50 challenge. Admittedly after watching the replays, Ollie was even higher than his opponent, but that does not alter what happened next. With both players on the deck, Neale Barry walked over to the West Brom lad, looked at the number on his back, got his cards and notebook out and explained to the other West Brom players that it was his second yellow so he was off (quote West Brom striker Geoff Horsely after the game). The West Brom players proceeded to scream their disapproval, and the cards were mysteriously put away without a word. All this infront of the Sky cameras. Was there a national outcry? Was there chuff as like!!! Outrageous.

Anyone else noticed how this is the second time a player has clearly hurt Bernard in games refereed by Barry in recent seasons and walked away scot-free?? Shocking.

Last on the rant list this month is the current discussion over Dyer. Apparently, he’s recently been close to tears because a section of the Toon fans can’t forgive him for his refusal to play for SBR and distasteful treatment of the captain’s armband.

Tough.

Like many punters, I may choose not to boo him when he plays. I cheered as loud as the rest stood next to me at Ewood Park when he scored on Boxing Day (admittedly after having to ask 3 or 4 fellow punters whether that really was Dyer who had scored). However, the kid has blown it as far as being forgiven goes. No way. No chance.

Come out and make an immediate public TV apology within hours of the incident and you might get away with it. But a half-assed two line statement read for you put together after no offers from other clubs were forthcoming is a disgrace. Play half decent football and not need the width of the chuffing Titanic as a turning circle in midfield and I may start to think about it. Strike a ball towards goal with something approaching conviction rather than like your older sister when she’s taking it easy with you in goal…

…. When you’re 4…

and we may get somewhere.

But be approaching great once a year and nothing short of a complete waste of space the rest of the time coupled with everything else above and what you’ve got is as much chance of being forgiven as Jeff Whitley has of ever needing to buy a pint in Newcastle again (see last season’s First Division Play Off penalty shoot out video if you need help here!!)

Sell him.
Now.
To Portsmouth.
That’d teach him.


Laters folks.

Keep the faith.

Mark

Do you enjoy Mark's columns?
PLEASE E-Mail Mark Deeks with your views! (deekazoid@yahoo.co.uk!)

Previous columns:

- November 2004 -  With the exception of the away wins at Palace and Sochaux, things seem to have gone well and truly pear shaped!
- October 2004 -  Here we go again. Souey is now firmly in charge and it’s got to be a case of “so far so good”.
- September 2004 - What a month this was! Dyer refusing to play on the wing for his club, Woodgate sold to Real Madrid, bids for Wayne Rooney, and Sir Bobby Robson sacked - with Graeme Souness appointed to replace him!
- August 2004 - Mark's first column of the 2004/05 season, highlighting his views on our summer spending and the season ahead.

Related Links:
- Mark's Columns - 2002/03
- Mark's Columns - 2003/04

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