SEPTEMBER 2004

WOW. What a month. I have absolutely no idea where to start. Since we last met, NUFC’s touring pantomime has brought us:

• Freddy’s, “This is Bobby’s last year … No I know I haven’t told him yet but it’ll be fine…” scandalous statement.
• Dyer’s, “I won’t play on the right wing for my club and the most respected manager in British football but I’ll play on the left wing for my country and Sven ‘Teefal’ Goran Ericsson”, beyond description treachery.
• Woodgate’s “You’ve got to be having a laugh” sale to Real Madrid, CLEARLY without Robson’s approval.
• Freddy’s, “Don’t worry, you’ll be pleasantly surprised at what comes of the Woodgate sale”, which resulted in….
• A jaw-droppingly ludicrous bid to sign Wayne Rooney (to play centre half?) CLEARLY without Robson’s approval.
• The sacking of Sir Bobby on the second last day of the transfer window (oh aye, what supremely logical timing…)
• The appointment of Graeme Souness! 

Just a typical month at SJP!

I don’t really want to analyse all of these in detail, otherwise I’ll be hear till next month’s column’s deadline. But I do intend to pass comment on each.

Freddy, as I believe I have been saying for a while now, your time has come to step aside. If you look down the list above, you will see that with the exception of the Dyer debacle, Freddy was directly responsible for the lot. (Mind you, Souness might not turn out to be too bad a move, more of which late).

Fancy announcing to the world that your manager will be sacked in 12 months time without telling the manager first. Incredulous amounts of astonishment! It’s an outrageous stunt to pull, and on it’s own would warrant dismissal in my book. Unforgivable.

While I’m on the subject of Fat Fred, I’ll keep going, and save Dire for the end….

I’m not daft, I’m not stupid, and neither are the majority of Toon fans. I am fully aware that if Real Madrid come calling, then you are almost certain to sign. I love NUFC as much as the next guy, but I understand the pecking order of world football. And if I was a player who had spent much of the last two years injured, then surely I would at least secretly think to myself that I may have some serious problems that may curtail my future career and this kind of opportunity may not arise again, so I’d sign as quickly as possible. BUT…. If I was the chairman of said player, despite the fact that I would find the offer of £13.4 million tempting, I would not sanction the move within 24 hours, without a) consulting my manager (remember Bobby was “informed” that the deal had been agreed) and b) without having some vague proposition as to who the replacement would be.

This was staggeringly compounded by Bobby saying, “ I have no idea who we could get to replace Woodgate” and Freddy saying, “You don’t go into this kind of situation without a plan and I think most Newcastle fans will be pleasantly surprised by what comes out of this Woodgate deal” within 24 hours of each other!!!! Crushingly unbelievable. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, FREDDY! TALK TO YOUR MANAGER!! Most Toon fans felt we may well need a centre half before Woody was sold. After? Yeah, we needed at the very least one class centre half, if not two. We got none. And Freddy? That is SOLELY your fault.

At this point, the news broke that we were trying to sign Rooney. I am lost for words. Alright, the kid can play. And yeah, in another universe it would have been great to have him playing in black and white. But it was never, ever, ever, ever going to happen in a month of Sundays. And it was completely unnecessary. And you can’t help but feel that if the time wasted on the pointless bidding war that we managed to land ourselves in with Man Ure had been spent on signing a top class centre half, we might not be sat in such a daft position. Remember, even including the completely inexperienced Stephen Taylor, we have 7 defenders at the club. Not even two people for each position like Jose Mourinho’s Chelsea squad, which was called “small” and “ruthlessly assembled”. And those 7 include Titus Bramble who guarantees 3 chances per game for opposition strikers.

For the record, seeing as we suddenly had a reputed £30 million to spend, (where exactly did that come from?), I would have offered the £13.4 million straight out the other hand for Ledley King at Spurs, and probably would have gone to £15 million seeing as desperate times call for desperate measures. I also thought that the reported £5 million offer for Bobo Balde at Celtic was a good shout, but predictably not enough to get him. Maybe £7 or £8 million would have done it. So it could have been two, top-class centre-halves and £7 or £8 million in the bank instead of Rooney. The fact that we now have to last till Christmas with none is disgusting. Freddy? This is SOLELY your fault.

This was FURTHER compounded by sacking Bobby on the second last day of the transfer window, then making a couple of hurried last minute bids for centre halves. Unbelievable. Freddy. Did you really think that players would sign for a club in that position? If so, you are beyond hope.

On the rights and wrongs of the sacking, it was clearly a case of right call, wrong time. Bobby, loveable, respectable, admirable and entertaining though he is, had undoubtedly lost certain quarters of the dressing room, was unable to remedy our woeful away record and general soft centre, and had even managed to produce a team full of attacking potential that was beginning to resemble a route one outfit. However, this was all evident last season, and begs the question why the decision was not taken earlier. If it had, then a new manager could have been installed in a less pressured environment, the players bought would have had the new manager’s approval (are we sure our four summer buys could all say they are Bobby buys?), and a Woodgate replacement could have been able to know what he was letting himself in for. Thanks Bobby, you did a decent job and there were some great times. But your departure was, for my money, overdue. Saying that, the way it was eventually handled was disgraceful. Freddy? This is SOLELY your fault.

Before I deal with Dyer (and I know how I’d like to deal with him…) there is the small matter of the new man at charge, Graeme Souness. I’d like to take this opportunity to welcome him on board and wish him every success. I’d also like to say something which I get the impression is not exactly a flavour of the moment sentiment. I’m glad we appointed Souness.

There. I said it. Don’t get me wrong, give me the chance to cherry pick any manager for the Toon, and I doubt Souness would rank in the top ten. Take out the fanciful picks such as Wenger and Mourinho etc, then I doubt he would make the top half dozen. But in current circumstances, and faced with the much lauded possibilities of Steve Bruce, Terry Venables and Alan Shearer (a god, no doubt, but surely the job came ten years too soon), then I think we did alright.

Some fans have claimed he has no proven success record. That is obviously untrue. In fact, it is only his short stint at Southampton that did not produce silverware. Granted, his recent record at Blackburn is poor. But if during the next three or four years all we get is a League or F.A. Cup, will there really be any of us complaining? No. I’m going to stick my neck out. I have a good feeling about this. I don’t expect titles or European glory. But I do expect a domestic cup. In fact, I’ve already got money on it.

Besides, I’d kill to see his first little private chat with Dyer…

Which brings me to my last topic this month. I’ll keep this short and sweet. Dire. The kid is overrated. Fact. He is arrogant. Fact. He has a deathwish on the road. Fact. He has an abysmal strike rate for an attacking midfielder. Fact. He creates little for others. Fact. He refused to do the job is he paid in excess of £40 grand a week for. Fact. He picked up the captain’s armband with a disdain reserved for chewing gum from the bottom of your shoe. Fact. According to a number of sources, he had to be “forced” to issue a four-line apology through his manager rather than in public. Fact. Morally, personally and tactically I hope he never plays for the Toon again. Fact.

There you go. And I never even mentioned the four matches we played. Frankly, I don’t even want to think about them. The season starts here.

Catch you next month.

Keep the faith.

Mark

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Previous columns:
- August 2004 - Mark's first column of the 2004/05 season, highlighting his views on our summer spending and the season ahead.

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- Mark's Columns - 2002/03
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