By Albatross
December 3 2002

As Brian Barry "I'm not bitter" Murphy signs on with Pools for another month, Albatross looks at the records to show that his name is far from the strangest to be seen on a Pools Teamsheet. Pools confirmed earlier on today that Brian Barry-Murphy is staying on at Pools for another month. The Irishman has already played five times for Pools after starting in Colin West's first game in charge at Exeter.

How good he is seems to be open to question - certainly he hasn't done enough to convince many Poolies that he's the long-term answer at left back. However he does add a certain something to our side - a strange name.

What constitutes a strange name is very much a matter of personal choice. The Rochdale commentators last season seemed to find Gordon Watson and Jonathan Bass hysterically funny, but allowances should be made for the fact that it rains so much in that part of Lancashire that they have every chance of suffering from water on the brain.

We've had our fair share of odd names over the years, including of course the Promotion Season where we had Cox and Nobbs in defence, and a little after that saw John Thomas sign for us - a man who when he played against us one year found his name greeted with disbelieving laughter from the Poolie Ranks.

One former Poolie has even made it to the attention of National Media; after Adrian Chiles on 5 Live found his name exceptionally funny, Barrie Wardrobe found himself tracked down and interviewed on his Saturday Morning show last year.

One wonders what Chiles would have made of some of the other names from Pools' past. Gardner Spiers for example, who made two appearances for us. Or of course the immortal Jade Sinclair, who sounds more like a Catwalk Model than a Footballer. Willie McStay played three times while on loan at Pools before he McWent. Michael Dunwell left for local non-league no doubt leaving the Mail Sport Editor distraught at not being able to use "The Lad Dunwell" and "Dunwell Again" for headlines.

There was Jack Tither in the 30s, a couple of other Nobbs, Tommy Sword, and Windy Roberts. Dorman Bell must have raised an eyebrow or two back in 1929. Ambrose Fogarty pales in comparison.

Pride of place in my own mind must go to Frank Spraggon and Alan Foggon. Maybe it's something to do with having a double G, but there's just something about those names that really allows you to get your False Teeth into them.

Maybe someday Brian Barry-Murphy will stand alongside those great names of the past - but all of them have to bow down to the most bizarre name ever given to anyone in this country: in Kent in the early 80's, one couple named their child in a way that makes you hope that they set aside some money for the Deed Poll there and then. I don't know if the kid ever played Football, but what Referee would ever belive someone who said their name was "Depressed Cupboard Cheesecake"?