By Chris Chaplin
January 7 2004

I understand that two of the causes of high cholesterol are fatty food and stress and with the temptation of an Ulster Fry or two for visiting supporters and bags of stress as the under performing Tigers visit Ravenhill on Sunday local Leicester GPs could be very busy come Monday.

Pool One, in which Tigers and Ulster find themselves, doesn’t have the luxury of a “rabbit” with all four teams capable, on paper at least, of progressing to the knock-out stages of the competition, although on domestic form Tigers are producing the least convincing argument for such progression.

All four teams know that a home loss will likely be curtains and thus far the fixtures have favoured the home side with Tigers topping the table level on points with Stade Francais, both having scored five point home victories.

Ulster are of course previous European Champions and formidable at Ravenhill, currently standing second in the Celtic league just a point adrift of leaders Llanelli Scarlets they are themselves only two points ahead of their companions in the pool, Gwent Dragons. They are already winners of this season’s Celtic Cup.

What is telling in Ulster’s performance in the Celtic League is that of the top three they have conceded just 178 points whereas Llanelli have conceded 194 and Gwent 190. Clearly strong defensively and when this is matched to their having scored 311 points compared to 272 and 251 respectively for their top three companions it will be seen that they can rattle up the points as well. This all having given them a favourable points difference of 133 which compares very well with Llanelli’s 78 and Gwent’s 61 and before anybody says it’s all down to David Humphreys boot I’d direct them to Ulster’s try-bonus points!

Ulsters’ last outing saw them narrowly lose by just two points to Leinster at Donnybrook with New Zealander Paul Steinmetz, Ireland International Tyrone Howe and the newly honoured Dr David Humphreys all crossing the whitewash and thereby seeing them outscore their opponents by three tries to two with the stunning kicking form of Leinster’s Scrum-half Brian O’Meara being the eventual deciding factor with his personal haul of 23 points. Indeed had Humphreys been in top kicking form then the Northern Ireland side would have surely prevailed.

Now I don’t profess to be an ardent student of the Irish club scene or indeed to take other than a passing interest in the Celtic league but what I have seen and heard of Ulster has impressed me.

In the front row prop Robbie Kempson, a 37 time Springbok is a typical uncompromising South African front row forward and so expect to see plenty of him in loose play. Hooker Matt Sexton is not of the exotic overseas persuasion and although he’s played almost 30 times for the province he’s been capped just the once for Ireland. Completing the front row at Donnybrook was Belfast Harlequins prop Simon Best who, having played on 55 occasions for Ulster and been capped four times for Ireland, brings experience to a front line that Kempson aside does not have names that readily trip of the tongue of many rugby supporters outside of Ireland but they clearly are good, close knit cohesive unit.

Against Tigers I rather thought that Wallaby prop Rod Moore might be preferred, bringing as he does the experience of 14 caps for Australia which may be needed against the Tigers front row but coach Solomons has remained faithful to the starting line up against Leinster.

At lock the uncapped Rowan Frost is to again start in the number 5 jersey and flanker turned lock Matt Mustchin has held off the challenge of specialist Ballymena lock Matt McCullough who remains on the bench. Given that Leinster’s Malcolm O’Kelly and Ben Gissing seemingly gained a degree of go forward last Friday it could be felt that against the Tigers duo of Johnson and Kay maximum specialist experience could be required.

The back row trio of skipper Andy Ward, Neil Best and Roger Wilson has a settled sort of look about it with Andy Ward at blindside having been capped 28 times for Ireland and getting on for a century of appearances for his province, he is a combative individual and will be very active at the breakdown as will young Neil Best although at 6’2” the Belfast Harlequins flanker may lack a bit of mobility at the breakdown while compensating for any shortcomings in this area with his capabilities at the maul. Completing the trio will be another Belfast Harlequin, Roger Wilson, just 22 years of age he’ll be relishing his opportunity on the big stage.

At scrum half Neil Doak is a good steady player and also keeps his place against Tigers but unlike his competitor for the #9 spot, Dungannon’s Kieran Campbell, he can drift in and out of games. I like Campbell a lot, a real feisty playmaker he could give Healey plenty to think about if he gets a run out.

At 10 of course will be Dr David Humpreys MBE although I doubt he’ll be swopping tales of honours won with his fellow Tiger honours winners. Not much to say about him really, we’ve all seen him win games with his boot although I am not always convinced that he’s the best of playmakers but on his day he can do the business, as the Dungannon mans’ 80 Irish caps bears witness.

On the left wing we’ll certainly see Irish winger and double British Lion Tyrone Howe. Not of the modern gargantuan variety of winger but strong and forceful and a wonderful finisher, watch for him coming off his wing and through close to the scrum on the burst.

In the centre Kiwi Paul Steinmetz seems to be winning himself no small degree of affection from the Ravenhill faithful since his arrival. A stocky powerful centre with just one opportunity to wear the famous black jersey I hope that he is able to test himself against compatriot Daryl Gibson as this could be a key area on Sunday.

If Steinmetz can get his centre partner away, who is to be Ballymena’s Shane Stewart, rather than the superb Ryan Constable, who does not even make the replacements bench, the Ulster support must be hoping against hope that he’ll justify his selection ahead of both Wallaby Constable and Adam Larkin. Capped just once for Australia Constable is one of those players who makes things happen and I can only assume that his exclusion from the squad is due to injury.

James Topping also keeps his place, which after an indifferent defensive display against Leinster I thought must have been under threat from newcomer Andrew Maxwell who has got something of a groundswell of popular support.

The back three sees converted half back Paddy Wallace hold on to the jersey although I have seen him look a bit vulnerable under pressure so wondered whether coach Solomons might have gone for specialist experience and opted for Bryn Cunningham who has made 42 appearances for Ulster.

I guess the question is whether the Ulster pack can produce sufficient set piece ball to get their backs away and the selection at scrum-half will now be more crucial than ever with good ball utilisation and service to Humphreys to enable him to pin Tigers back inside their own 22 with his educated boot the probable game-plan.

As for Tigers. Well last Saturday saw another of the strange performances to which I’ve sadly become accustomed over the past couple of years and the loss against Gloucester, again at home, where the walls of Fortress Welford Road are looking distinctly shaky, signalled the realistic death knell of participation in Europe next season other than by Tigers actually winning the HEC for the third time.

The atmosphere at Welford Road should have been buzzing on Saturday. Gloucester at home. Capacity crowd. Holiday atmosphere. Webb Ellis Cup in attendance. What else could be needed for festivities?

Well an extraordinary decision to parade the RWC after rather than before the match set the tone and by the time Will Young had told us that it was a case of leaving right now before things got any worse many of the sixteen thousand odd fans could have been excused if they’d sought counselling rather than their photograph being taken with the Webb Ellis Trophy.

The atmosphere was reflected by the team who looked flat and subdued from the outset.

Candidly I don’t see much of a viable option in the front row from Rowntree, Richards and Darren Morris even if one were wrongly sought and they should have the beating of the Ulster trio with only Kempson having the experience to match that of the Tigers’ props. Richards I thought did pretty well against Glaws although some twerp behind me kept asking why he was throwing to whomsoever he had – I gently pointed out that he was throwing to where the line out caller told him!! So no change in the front row surely.

Ben Kay was probably the pick of the tight five but I thought Johnno again looked preoccupied, perhaps he’s not fit but we’ll need our colossus to be at his very best and produce a dominating performance against the relatively inexperienced Ulster duo.

Neil Back looks less than enamoured of his ersatz captain’s role in the prevailing circumstances but he is as full of commitment as ever and is obviously a shoo in.

Although news from Oval Park remains at it’s Kremlin-like best I got the feeling from reports in the press that Corry could be fit, let’s hope so for we badly need his go forward play from #8. Similarly I’m not sure of the state of play as far as Adam Balding is concerned but if fit he must surely start at blindside with Corry at #8.

Henry Tuilagi for all his barnstorming actually made precious little ground against a resolute Gloucester defence and I fear his lack of subtlety and variety to his game will again be counter productive.

I have been one of the greatest advocates of Healey playing consistently at scrum-half
But on Saturday I wondered why as he had a terrible time. Notwithstanding this he will presumably and indeed should start on Sunday but there must be a big question mark up in the ether if he doesn’t show some of his old verve, especially against Doag.

With Goode cup-tied Pez will surely be back. Many ask why players don’t want to come to Tigers, perhaps they should have a chat with the young Argentinian!

Now while it’s hard to second guess Deano, as Pez has not even been on the bench of late perhaps he is cast as the fatted calf slain upon the return of the prodigal from Watford way. I very much hope this is not the case as personally I very much admire the talented young Italy fly-half but would not be that surprised to see Vesty return at #15 with Jaco moving to #10. Not, I hope, the strategy, but prepare yourself anyway – just in case we are in “Disruption-is-Us” mode! Hopefully good sense will prevail and Pez will return

I hope against hope that the other casualty of the Twickenham Pantomime, Daryl Gibson, is back so that Ollie can get back to outside centre if not I wonder if there’s any chance of Gelderbloom at #12? Well as Deano was on the radio last Saturday saying that he thought Leon played outstandingly well against Glaws presumably not. Leon may be a poor centre but he’s a good winger able to run straight and having the size and strength to force home his attack, which brings me to the wingers.

Without doubt in the right conditions Neil Baxter is outstanding in attack and also no slouch in defence with some good high class technical tackling. He has the advantage of course of being able to use his speed if he gets his initial positioning a bit wrong but still he doesn’t just dive in but waits his moment. On the other hand we have Fred, who’s missed tackles are becoming a real Achilles Heel and he looks to have lost a deal of his pace since returning from injury.

We do have a good winger in Leon so for mercies sake let’s play him there and then a good, intelligent, experienced centre called Gelderbloom could deputise for Gibson if required.

Jaco continues to impress me and whether he starts at his original position of #10 or at his current #15 slot start he must, looking, with Ollie, the two who are playing well even if during play Ollie has to drift into the #13 channel to do so.

I also wonder at the defensive alignment from set pieces when there’s acres of space out wide for the attacking backs to run at and assume that this too is a product of the disjointed back division but whatever the reason it’s a point of weakness.

An away victory could well be the catalyst that will see Tigers advance from the pool stages and of course on paper they have an excellent chance of doing so. Will they?

Ulster on paper and Ulster in the flesh at Ravenhill, where they’ll be burning with the passion that seems so lacking at Tigers just now and which Deano is at a loss to explain, in fact in an interview on Sky he invited Graham Simmons to ask the players why it was so, are two very different matters.

I have to say I find it hard to imagine that a team which played as it did last Saturday in such propitious circumstances can turn things around in the distinctly hostile environment that Ravenhill will present. Perhaps the Tigers will fight when cornered, perhaps the passion will return, perhaps a January afternoon on a foreign field will be when it all changes. I hope so but somehow I don’t think so.