By ChrisC
December 7 2010

Thank Heavens for little girls..... sang Maurice Chevalier in the 1958 film Gigi and you are already wondering what this has to with rugby.  Well I thought this week I’d indulge in a bit of national stereotyping to set the scene for this Saturday’s encounter with USAP, or to be formal, Union Sportive des Arlequins Perpignanais, at  Stade Aime Giral which, which with its 14593 capacity, is an absolute bear pit.  OK back to the stereotyping.

Firstly you will need a lit Gauloise (obviously don’t smoke it or the latest health commissar; Andrew Lansley will be all over you like a cheap suit) and a crushed clove of garlic and this will give the atmosphere.

Now you need to dress in a striped vest, red socks, beret, trousers that are a smidgen too short, get an old bicycle and string some onions over the handlebars and finally if you are from the distaff side obtain a (hopefully) false moustache.

Now settle yourself on one of those little chairs that can be found in French cafes, which cut off the blood supply to any legs not fixed to a Frenchman, pour yourself a glass of Pastis, wait for the rioting students to arrive and you’re set .

So the relevance?  Well you will now be in what was presumably the mindset of USAP’s players when they visited Parc  y Scarlets back on 9^th October.

The French visitors were infuriating to watch that day as they veered between flashes of brilliance and such Gallic insouciance that once they’d played a bit of rugby they shrugged and returned to the little bistros they must have had set up at the corner flags.

They started off as if they were in the mood and scored two early tries through Grandclaude and Julien Candelon, then they got out the Pernod and settled down to a prolonged period when it looked like they’d rather be anywhere than deepest Wales thus permitting the home side to run in four tries of their own.

After having the Plat du Jour and a glass or two of Beaujolais the French side thought they’d better do a bit more work and popped back and scored another three tries through Plante, Tonita and Chouly but all the while Stephen Jones kept the score board rolling for Scarlets as referee Andrew Small pinged the visitors remorselessly but being Mr Small the reasons were  obscure although when USAP full back Jerome Porical did an impression of David Beckham’s kick at Argentina’s  Diego Simeone in the 1998 World Cup he had no choice other than to send him off for a ten minute rest at the bistro. While he was there having coffee and cognac Scarlets scored two more tries and in the end ran out winners at 43 points to the visitors 34, there having been a total of nine tries in the match with five coming from the French side. It was typical of matches run by Mr Small, full of his whistle and so loose as to require Imodium.

The aristocrats of French rugby with a 16 million Euro playing budget (up from last year’s mere 3.7 million Euros) and who have won the French championship on seven occasions, the last in 2008/09 which was the first time for 54 years, while last season they topped the league but lost in their Play Off final to Clemont, showed they can do it when they want to and with the home crowd behind them they should be in the mood on Saturday, especially as they lost 20 – 29 to Toulon when they played there last in the French Top 14, which will not have amused club president Paul Goze.

Following the sabbatical that the French league sensibly has while the Autumn Internationals take place they travelled to Castres last weekend and lost 23 -13, which can’t be doing too much for their confidence as they languish at ninth place in the Top 14.

Tigers meanwhile, without such welcome respite, were down in Reading giving their hosts a lesson in set piece play and as a consequence securing their first away win of the season in the Premiership, so moving to second in the league ahead of the next couple of European Cup matches, which brings me neatly to next Saturday.

As was the case at Parc y Scarlets the Catalans were slow out of the traps and conceded three tries in the first quarter last week giving Castres a 17 – 3 lead at half time.  This third try coming as it did from the hosts’ fly half pouncing on a kick through from his half back partner and beating the USAP full back Porical to the ball which will have been of interest to the Tigers’ management.  In fact had Castres not missed two conversions the picture would have been even bleaker for the visitors.

In the second half USAP were able to chalk up a try from an interception by David Marty but that was about the only way they were going to cross the whitewash against a determined home defence so once again USAP failed to win or even secure a bonus point, their tally of the latter being a big fat canard this season.

Current France international, Jerome Schuster, who was part of the French team recently humiliated by Australia at the Stade de France, shares a starting berth with Tigers’ old boy Perry Freshwater these days and links with ever present club captain and France stalwart Nicolas Mas with Romanian powerhouse Marius Tincu at hooker who, having started 39 test matches for his country, completes a powerful and vastly experienced front row for the hosts.

 Tincu had a bit of a barney with the ERC judiciary who last year found against him over a gouging allegation on Ospreys’ Paul James even though there was no “smoking gun” of evidence and USAP, after exploring all available routes of appeal, finally had it upheld by the Comité National Olympique et Sportif Français (CNOSF), the top legal body for sport in France, as USAP claimed that Tincu should not be banned from playing in the domestic French league for an offence committed in a cross-border competition, so USAP told the IRB  to go forth and multiply and Tincu returned to playing in the Top 14. Primacy of French law winning the day – don’t you just have to grudgingly admire our Gallic neighbours for their chutzpah!?  They seem to view Leagunion in much the same way.

Tigers will doubtless start with Ayerza, Chuter and Castrogiovanni so I foresee a titanic battle in the front row. The Tigers’ trio could be sorely tested in this key battleground and it’s hard to see anything other than a sheet of Bronco between the two front rows.

At lock I’d expect to see ex Narbonne and Biarritz lock Olivier Oubeau partner the Cameroonian Tchale-Watchou who is not, as far as I know, a supporter of the UK Prime Minister but is a fixture at number 5 for USAP when he’s not suspended that is, which he was for ten days during November.

Watchou looked pretty solid in the line out against Scarlets when he was partnering out of position flanker Yohan Vivalda and both were very active in the loose and around the breakdown and in spite of the attention of Mr Small threatened the home defence.

Tigers will register the recently returned Louis Deacon who had a good outing against London Irish both in the line out and especially in defence, while George Skivington is playing very well and benefiting from having an experienced partner in the second row.  I think that the ex Wasp has been unfairly criticised in some quarters where appreciation of this fine player, who has not only had to cope with a change of club, ethos and domicile but also being thrust into the unfamiliar role of senior line out partner, has been both scant and grudging.

I see some potential advantage here for the visitors particularly given the new found exuberance and presence of Craig Newby at the set piece.

In the breakaway units I anticipate that young Bertrand Guiry will again be preferred to Le Corvec with the experienced, 22 time capped Romanian Toniţa, who with his back row colleague Chouly scored against Scarlets, retaining the  open side berth instead of the 6’6” ex Springbok, Gerrie Britz who was on parade at Llanelli but the flanker, together with his colleagues, struggled with Mr Small’s interpretation at the breakdown, but then most players do, and as a consequence they were blown to death by the diminutive Kiwi’s whistle, happy days indeed that he won’t be in charge this week.

Henry Tuilagi is fit and sharing the #8 shirt with the ex Brive and Limoge player Damien Chouly who has played four times for his country but never on the winning side.  He’s a very mobile player and will be challenging for any kicks to the Tigers’ back three however I expect both the Frenchman and our very own Henry Tuilagi to play a part and we certainly know what to expect from Henry.

Tigers could conduct some role play of the likely meeting of siblings Henry and Alex using David Haye and Audley Harrison for the task although the latter would have to promise to take part this time!

The new Tigers’ back row combination is working a treat now with the axis of, for my money the outstanding overseas signing of the year, Thomas Waldrom, and bang in form Jordan Crane,  knocking holes the size of the Blackwall Tunnel in opposition defences.

Crane has mastered the new law interpretations well, or at least he thought he had until referee Dave Pearson pinged him close to the Tigers’ line down at Reading on Sunday.  I’ve looked at the play several times and it seems to me that Crane had ticked every box on the Excel spreadsheet that players have to carry in their brains these days, he was not the tackler, he was over the attacker, he was not off his feet, was supporting his own weight and had entered through the gate so what on Earth was Pearson whistling for?  It’s another mystery of inconsistency!

Craig Newby has embraced his return to the open side and is playing the new Leagunion way and Woods will have to go some to recover the #7 shirt when he gets back from his latest injury, especially given the Kiwi’s performance in the line out.

I like the chances of the settled Tigers’ back row this Saturday and in spite of the missing Tom Croft reckon that, as it won’t be a French referee but Alan Lewis, who I’ve almost forgiven for the debacle when Biarritz visited Welford Road a few years back, that  Leagunion rules will apply so the Tigers’ trio will prove the more effective around the breakdown in particular.

Behind the pack young France “A” Florian Cazenave has been a regular starter for the Catalans and he certainly looked lively against the Scarlets with a pass as hot as a jar of Piri-Piri and a gimlet eye for the gap.

Against Castres he was partnered by the veteran Aussie; Manny Edmonds who joined USAP from Bayonne in the closed season as player/coach and is scheduled to retire to a full time coaching role sometime soon.  He’s a wily character with a great kicking record and he’s my bet to retain the shirt with the superb Nicolas Laharrague absent and South African Gavin Hume, who came from Stormers in 2004 and who had the fly half berth against Scarlets looking the converted centre that he is that day and I expect to see Edmonds give the Tigers’ defence a bit of a work out with his game management. 

Toby Flood will hopefully be restored and if so I expect the England half backs to gain some good go forward for their backs against the USAP pairing.

The centres for the hosts are pretty much sure to be the default duo of Grandclaude, who is a forceful and clever runner, scoring a lovely try against Scarlets and the ever present David Marty who was part of the 2007 Six Nations winning side.  Hugely experienced with 31 caps for his country and ten tries he will give the Tigers defence plenty to think about.

Of an equally default nature these days is the partnership of Tony Allen and Matt Smith for Tigers who have been so outstanding for the club during its travails this season but they will have to be at their very best to contain the USAP centres and my guess is that they’ll target the 10/12 channel where Edmonds is not quite as sprightly as when in his Wallaby pomp.

Out wide for the hosts is likely to be another settled couple, that of Candelon, who has been capped both in the fifteen a side and seven a side versions of the game and is a real flyer, and France ‘A’ player Adrien Plante.

These two have a stable link with the aforementioned local boy Jerome Porical who follows a family tradition of playing for the Catalans with both his father and Grandfather playing for the club.  This lad is a Deadeye Dick with the boot both from hand and from the tee, having been instrumental in USAP’s championship victory in 2009, scoring 15 of their 23 points that day. However he can be found wanting in the defensive positioning stakes and I think the Tigers will be exploring this facet of his game with frequent grubbers into the space he can leave unprotected.

The Tigers’ back three also has a settled feel with Scott Hamilton, Alex Tuilagi and Geordan Murphy.  The All Black rarely puts a foot wrong and will be central in the testing of Porical and with Alex Tuilagi using that slanting run into the opposition midfield it could also be tested with Geordan Murphy, who had his best match of the season against London Irish, feeding off the likely mayhem.

Tuilagi was unlucky not to pick off an interception try against Irish and instead to get a penalty against him for his efforts, yet when Ojo tried the same thing earlier with the same result only a scrum was awarded how I long for consistency from match officials.

If the Tigers’ midfield can hold the line and give their back three decent possession recent history suggests that there’s a way past the USAP defence.

So will it be Champagne or Vin Ordinaire for Tigers?

It’s a daunting task for the Tigers but they have a good record against the Catalans, are at almost full strength and with USAP sans the winning habit I rather think we may see a famous Tigers’ victory in the positively balmy 11 degrees sunshine that’s forecast.

Now where’s that Ardennes pate?

Thank Heavens - Perpignan v Tigers Preview

Discussion started by TheLeicesterTigers.co.uk , 07/12/2010 18:48

TheLeicesterTigers.co.uk
07/12/2010 18:48

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Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2010:12:15:18:06:38 by Stephen Bath.

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Tiggs
07/12/2010 18:49

Many thanks to Chris as always for a most superb preview.

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IDLETIMES
07/12/2010 18:50

I will be happy with a bonus point whether Cockers will is another matter.

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odd-shaped vagaries
07/12/2010 19:37

I will only be happy with that 'Ashes' feeling, and no sackcloth

As toot as heffer = grassy 4rse

'Lions led by donkeys' .. Lest we forget

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Stopsy
07/12/2010 20:34

Mucky buckets garcon, tres bien. Hon hon hon cherie etc.

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Yorkie
07/12/2010 21:15

Your in depth knowledge of our opposition continues to impress. Thanks for the education.

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Johns
07/12/2010 21:51

Brilliant again Chris, thank you.

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Tiggs
07/12/2010 22:05

Did Chris really miss the fact that this game is Tigers 100th HC match ?

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tigersimon
08/12/2010 10:59

Thanks Chris, I also could not see why JC was penalised at the Mad.

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Rich W
08/12/2010 11:05

Excellent again Chris. You may have forgiven Mr Lewis his travesty in the game against Biarritz. You are obviously more generous of heart than I!

Like Yorkie says - impressive knowledge mate! Here's hoping your analysis is sound and your conclusion correct.

...

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(JSF)
08/12/2010 13:51

Awesome prevew again, thanks Chris.

Can't wait to get on the plane now...

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Roger
08/12/2010 14:40

Another superb offering from the ChrisC keyboard.

'Insouciance' eh? I don't often have to reach for the dictionary.

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IDLETIMES
10/12/2010 12:46

Yes another excellent piece from Chris and the 100th Euro game for Tigers shows a certain level of consistency

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saracens4life
10/12/2010 23:54

Leinster's 100th HC game as well. How many are Munster on, anyone know??

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Tiggs
11/12/2010 08:55

Munster were on 101 before last season started.





Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2010:12:11:08:56:48 by Tiggs.

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Yorkie
12/12/2010 00:48

You've got to remember that Tigers have had 2 less seasons than some to achieve the 100 game mark.

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