By Semper Scorchio
November 24 2005

It was only when I looked hurriedly at the team sheets printed in the mini-programme whilst Mad Max read out the line ups that the truth of the old adage "Never volunteer" became obvious. So I would like to start with an apology to any Samoan players who I have incorrectly identified, or misspelled their names but with Mad Max's famed linguistic ability once again causing mirth in the stands can you really blame me? It also appeared that the shirt number did not always match the programme either! As a corollary the only reason that I was able to identify some of the younger members of the Quins team was that I have managed to make it to a few A League games this season.

It was a clear but extremely cold night at the Twickenham Stoop for a match primarily designed as a fundraiser. Though the legendary All Black and Samoan Coach Michael Jones felt that his squad needed this game like "a hole in the head" the fact that 50% of the net profits would go to Manu Samoa prompted many to come to and show their support including a fair number of neutrals. Given the proximity of important games for both Quins and Manu Samoa, the teams on display were, of necessity, drawn from the wider squads of both Harlequins and Samoa and called upon a mix of youth and experience.

One of the drawbacks of an evening kick-off is that people appear to struggle to get to the game in time for the start, and spectators were still streaming into the ground even with 15 minutes of the first half gone. This did not improve your reporter's view from the cheap seats in the East stand.

The game started without much preamble and without the performance of the Siva Tau. The first half was a generally scrappy affair with the cold weather doing its best to hamper the handling of both sides and the signal for knock-on threatening to give referee Rowden R.S.I.

Within the first five minutes Jarvis had the opportunity to kick a penalty after a Samoan player had gone offside. 3 – 0. After the restart Quins had a strong scrum inside the Samoan 22 in line with the posts but could not make use of the possession. Referee Rowden came back for another penalty for offside that Jarvis duly converted. 6 – 0.

It was then Samoa's turn to press forward in attack but after a strong tackle by Diprose in which he succeeded in turning his man Quins gained turnover ball. However, after a defensive kick into touch Quins were penalised for pulling down at the subsequent Samoan lineout. Penalty kicked by Lolo Lui. 6 – 3.

At this point my notebook sums up the game so far as 'disjointed', 'scrappy breakdown' and 'an eagerness to run on both sides'. Samoa had to reshuffle their back line as their fly half went off for some medical attention with Lolo Lui moving up to cover.

There was some strong running from Guest and then a kick and chase from Amesbury that applied a serious amount of pressure to the Samoan defence. Turner-Hall gathered the ball after the Samoan kick had been charged down, some quick hands got the ball to Diprose on the wing who dove over the line only for the try to be disallowed as he had gone into touch. The Samoan lineout was ruled not straight and Quins opted for the scrum but could not make the pressure tell and eventually Samoa won a penalty and cleared their lines.

There were further attacks by Quins, Mike Brown made an excellent tumbling kick to force a lineout inside the Samoan 22. The next move saw some close interplay on the gain-line between Jarvis and Turner-Hall ending with the latter being illegally tackled high. Penalty to Quins. 9 – 3.

Quins pressed forward again with some strong running from Mike Brown, followed by Burke and Worsley though the ball went into touch. The next play saw Guest take the ball into the Samoan midfield and whilst he was slow to get up, the ball passed along the line to Diprose and Ward. Play continued as Guest received some treatment and Amesbury appeared in the line and put a grubber kick through into the Samoan 22. However the kick was gathered by Faletoese Talapusi, the Samoan Fly Half, who set off on a strong run and passed to the lock Faamatuainu at speed, with support from the outside centre the move was finished by the winger Gasolo Salima. Try to Samoa 9 – 8. This was a blistering example of the power and speed of handling for which the Samoans are rightly famed. Lolo Lui converted to make the score 9 – 10. The Samoans were penalised a few minutes later for going into the side of the Quins maul. 12 – 10 and half time.

Quins made three changes at half time, Aston Croall on for Worsley, George Robson on for Burke and Kiba Richards for Masson. Almost from the restart there was an athletic break from the impressive Samoan lock Faamatuainu. Then came the most interesting substitution of the night, Steve So'oailo came on in the blue of Manu Samoa. At last, I thought, an opportunity to see Vass and So'oailo side by side and perhaps give more mileage to the debates on CAW!

Quins were awarded a penalty within kicking range but decided to kick for the corner with Harder running the crash ball into midfield, there were some handbags at the breakdown but the scrum went to Quins. Diprose picked up from the base but there was no way through because of some clattering tackles in defence from the Samoans. Referee Rowden brought play back for a offside penalty. Quins chose to kick the three points on this occasion. 15 – 10.

Lorne Ward and Ian Vass were substituted, being replaced by Alex Rogers and Simon Keogh respectively, so Steve and Ian were on the pitch together for only about 10 minutes, hardly conclusive.

Quins won another penalty for a Samoan player holding on, but this time the kick bounced off the left upright.

At approximately 21 minutes into the game there was an incident at a breakdown on the west side of the pitch but unfortunately too far away for me to see clearly what actually happened. The referee and touch judge had an extended conversation that resulted in a straight red card for the Samoan prop Donald Kerslake, I assume this was for punching. The Samoans were forced into further re-jigging of personnel at the next scrum right under their posts. Diprose broke from the base and drew the tackle from the defender and Alex Rogers appeared on his inside shoulder to carry the ball over the line. Try. Converted. 22 – 10.

Turner-Hall went off to be replaced by Tom Williams who was soon into the action with a pacy and weaving return of a Samoan kick. This movement culminated in George Robson barrelling over the line after bouncing out of two tackles and with two more Samoans holding onto him. Converted. 29 – 10.

At this point of the game it did not seem that Samoa were unduly affected having been reduced to 14 men and they pressed forward, a bullocking run by Tuilagi eventually ended with a Samoan ruck on the Quins five metre line and Steve So'oailo picked up the ball and he quickly drove over the line. Unfortunately the straightforward conversion was missed, and the kicker himself, Lolo Lui seemed the most upset in the stadium! 29 – 15.

There were no further scores in the game.

Man of the Match was declared as Chris Robshaw.

This was not the free flowing game that many had hoped but it was keenly contested at the breakdown with some impressive tackling around the fringes. Both sides had strong defences that proved hard to breach. There were plenty of flashes of individual skill in open play but, apart from the Samoan try in the first half, very few cohesive moves as handling appeared to be difficult in the cold.

It seems to me that this season those on the fringes of the First XV have more opportunities to play in important games than last season, with the Guinness A league against Premiership opponents, the Powergen Trophy and appearances as cover in ND1 games where unlike last year's Premiership campaign there is less pressure to play partially fit senior players. It is likely that this starting lineup will face Bridgwater and Albion away in the cup on Saturday and they can be proud of their performance here.

The Samoans too can be proud of their performance given the difficulties of fielding a team three days before a test match against England. The official attendance was 4526, so hopefully the share of the match receipts will help finance some of the costs of the tour for Manu Samoa. I would come to see another Quins v Manu Samoa game - it might not have been pretty but it was certainly compelling and lacked nothing in application from both sides with the occasional glorious flash of individual skills.

Eight pages of notes, one frozen hand, one Harlequins Ladies Calendar, a Harlequins victory : Priceless!