Funnies

By Karl King
August 11 2005

J FUNNIES!   J

If you have any 'funnies' from the world of F1, please send them into me at karl.king@totallytoyotaf1.com

MURRAYISMS

 Here are some of our favourite quotes from the great ex-ITV commentator Murray Walker. In my own opinion, F1 on the T.V will never be the same again. Thank you Murray for everything you have done for the sport. We will all miss you!

"So Bernie [Ecclestone], in the seventeen years since you bought McLaren, which of your many achievements do you think was the most memorable ?" Bernie Answers, "Well I don't remember buying McLaren." [Bernie Ecclestone used to own the Brabham team].

Murray: And look at the flames coming from the back of Berger's McLaren
James: Actually, Murray, they're not flames, it's the safety light

"...and there's no damage to the car.....except to the car itself."

'and I interrupt myself to bring you this....'

"...Cruel luck for Alesi, second on the grid. That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year..."

"Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the action, which it is."

"As you can see, visually, with your eyes..."

"Andrea de Cesaris...the man who has won more Grands Prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them."

 "And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit, and Damon Hill in the pit, no it's Michael Schumacher!"

"Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. Oh no he isn't! It's a lap record."

"There are a lot of IFs in Formula One, in fact IF is Formula One backwards!"

"Tambay's hopes , which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."

"And there's the man in the green flag!"

"The Jordan factory is at the factory gates"

"You can't see a digital clock because there isn't one."

"The beak of Ayrton Senna's chicken is pulling ahead"

"And an enormous gap building before Mika Hakkinen goes through in third position...when I say enormous it's 1.5 seconds"

"Schumacher is still the fastest man on the track, not only by virtue of the fact that he leads the Australian Grand Prix, but he also holds the fastest lap"

Murray: "What's that? There's a BODY on the track!!!"
James: "Um, I think that that is a piece of BODY-WORK, from someone's car."

"I don't want to tempt fate but Damon Hill is now only half a lap from his first Grand Prix win and..and HE'S SLOWING DOWN, DAMON HILL IS SLOWING DOWN..HE'S..HE'S STOPPED."

Murray Walker: (Silverstone quali 2001) And theres Jarno Trulli what is he going to do in this qualifying session?
Martin Brundle: Is that Jarno Trulli wearing Heinz Harold-Frentzen's helmet then Murray?

OTHERS

ITV's Ted Kravitz: (on DC'S Suspension after colliding with Barrichello at Suzuka last year) It's the runt fright of DC's car that's damaged

 

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