By Darraghgirl
October 4 2015

  “Comfort me with Apples” it says in the bible (Solomon 2:5 if you are interested) and after England’s appalling performance at the world cup what we need is a bit of Motherhood & Apple pie. So here, to cheer us all up, is a report full of little green apples  

A lovely retro Golden Delicious afternoon at the Parkland of Bramley Road – once we negotiated Bear Grylls’ little cubs who had filled the car park at Cockfosters (a voyage of Discovery to Oak(apple)wood). (No Pioneers to show us the way). Sweet Green Ring-necked parakeets were shrieking overhead from the russet-leaved and Autumn Gold trees as we joined the small crowd around the pitch. We settled for the far side, just below the scoreboard which proved to be an excellent choice because Mark McCall decided to watch his Empire from 6 feet above us and we were treated to a Prim(e)a running commentary of the game, a real Surprise “Coach’s Cut”, much of it unrepeatable! His Dulcet tones lapse into a strong Ulster accent when he gets excited which is totally incomprehensible in all its Splendour - probably just as well!

This was more a repeat of last season’s A league Final Rivals than a real warm-up Gala game given that very few of those on view would be guaranteed starters: Jackson Wray, Itoje, Fraser maybe. Worcester started with former Sarrie Luke Baldwin and the Flamboyante Ryan Lamb at 10 but I can’t say I recognised any of the others. I have no idea who the referee was but so as not to upset the Applecart, I think it is probably best he remains anonymous! Sarries front row was not as advertised with Gill starting instead of the previously unknown Adams-Hale but his partners were of more interest. I have long thought that Biyi Alo has a Bright Future so it was nice to se   e him get a start along with stand-in Hooker Dave Porecki who revelled in the Limelight and really didn’t put a foot wrong all afternoon. Maybe he’ll become a Keepsake!

The game started with an exchange of penalties from Lamb and Spencer before Mordt departed his inside centre birth looking a bit groggy. He was replaced by Tom Griffiths. There was some careless play from both sides for the next few minutes but only 1 score – another penalty from Lamb before finally the Sarries’ backs got it together and a Scrumptious pass from Tompkins put Matt Hankin over in the corner for an Early Harvest (his boss behind us was Tickled Pink ). Spencer missed a tricky conversion (the posts weren’t very straight though!)

We got a look at another unknown when Nick Isiekwe replaced Ed Gower (of whom I was also unaware) in the blood bin. Lamb kicked another penalty which briefly gave Worcester a 9-8 lead. But Sarries’ scrum was clearly getting on top and won a kickable penalty. Enterprisingly Spencer put the ball in the corner and Sarries did what England couldn’t, mappuling the ball over – although the referee awarded a Penalty try before the ball was grounded. Spencer Piloted the conversion for 15-9. As half time approached, Sarries played with some Freedom but there was a knock-on close to the line (*!?X!£$ from behind). It looked like Baldwin would score a breakaway try but good defence pulled him into the Wayside and as half time Dawned, Spencer kicked another penalty, sure as God made little green apples, to give Sarries an 18-22 lead.

Sarries had their (Coxes) oranges on the pitch while Worcester went off to the dressing room. The Initial part of the second half started positively for Sarries and there was an off-load Sans Pareil from Jackson Wray which set up  Porecki (a la Brits or George) and a score from the America (Summer) Hooker. Baden Powell – I mean Kerr (it’s that Chieftan Scout thing that’s confusing me) kicked the extras. Spencer kicked another penalty to extend the lead to 28-9. (Summer) MaCall seemed worried about Fraser’s hamstrings so he was replaced by Ben Earle. We all felt a huge tapple on Adams, the Worcester wing, when he was hit right in front of us, by the combined weight of Porecki & Morris. Ouch! Talk about (Gold)rushing into a brick wall. Although not at his Bonnie Best, it was his good Fortune to emerge with just a fetching ear bandage! Finally Worcester managed to cross the line and the interestingly named Ripper-Smith touched down in the corner.

Sarries won a penalty on half way. Bossman was going Opalescent when they opted for the kick. This time it was Morris on the tee – but he wasn’t in the Hunt - his kick was short and wide. He was soon replaced by Matt Gallagher and Tom Whiteley replaced Ben Spencer. Over the next few minutes I lost track of who was coming and going for some little Cameos. Gill certainly departed having shown remarkable application by not upsetting the applecart for 70 minutes, to be replaced by Ralph Adams-Hale. There were anxious urges from behind to “get Itoje” (that line-out Beacon) “off” and in fact he took the Liberty  of all the subs coming on except Jared Saunders who was being “kept behind in case” – clearly our hookers are versatile!  It seemed that the “management” were keen to have a look at some of these young lads. With a few minutes left, Ben Earle scored a 4^th try wide on the right. Kerr just missed the conversion through the Goofy posts.

Re-envigoured by his grapple with the Sarries’ hard men, Josh Adams crossed for another Worcester try converted by (Granny) Smith before Sarries scored a 5^th with the excellent Jackson Wray completing a Starr turn Waltzing off the back of the line-out to end any hopes of a Worcester Revival. This time it was Tom Whiteley’s time in the Limelightand kick the points he did to give Sarries the Victory. And that was pretty much that. Everything was in Apple Pie order and Sarries had won 40-21. The crowd were definitely Cheerful and both teams departed to a round of applause.

We didn’t stay for the ”big match” Fiesta : Saracens Applateurs against Watford. With the prospect of defeating Bear Grylls and his merry men on the way home we needed plenty of time to get back to our Fireside! Bonza. (Perhaps I shouldn’t have used that one!)

SARACENS:

A Morris, N Earle, Tompkins, Mordt, Ellery, Kerr, Spencer, Gill, Porecki, Alo, Gower, Itoje, Fraser, Hankin, Wray. (Subs: Saunders, Adams-Hall, Walker, B Earle, Isiekwe, Cudmore, Nay, Whiteley, Malins, D Morris, Griffiths, Gallagher)

WORCESTER:

Howard, Adams, Stelling, Fatiaki, Smith, Lamb, Baldwin, Bower, Sowrey, Milasinovich, Davies-Moore, Kitchener, Ripper-Smith, Xiouroupda, Hill.

(Subs:- Singleton, Appiah, Daniels, Perks, Nott, Shillcock, Humphreys, Smith, Mikallcius)

Scorers:-

SARACENS:-

Tries:  Hankin, Penalty, Porecki, B Earle, Wray.  Conv: Spencer, Kerr, Whiteley. Pens: Spencer(3)

WORCESTER:-

Tries: Ripper-Smith, Adams. Convs: Smith  Pens: Lamb (3)