Saracens
An unofficial rugby dictionary
By Bboonie
July 6 2010
From time to time, a glossary of rugby terms is produced. A brief one appears thus: Foul Play - what the other side do. If your side do it, it’s called ‘using your initiative’. Ruck - informal, impromptu get-together for forwards and a few close friends.
Mark - if you can cleanly catch a ball kicked several hundred feet in the air within your own 22 metre line and call ‘mark’ while the entire other side is pounding towards you intent on doing you damage, you can have a free kick. You deserve it.
Offside - a natural break in the play called by the referee every 35 seconds to let everyone get their breath back.
A more comprehensive one with a Leicester Tigers bias:
Advantage: The situation when a referee decides to allow play to continue and not blow for an obvious transgression immediately, due to a mistaken impression that it somehow benefits a team.
Blindside: The term used to describe the referee's inability to see a foul committed. Following a technique refined by former All Black hooker and captain Sean Fitzpatrick that allowed him to commit a foul usually in a ruck or maul at the very moment that the referee turned his back to check on the offside line.
Openside Flanker: It is this player who, when approaching the end of a Cup Final, assumes the role of Scrum Half and puts the ball into the scrum.
Calcutta Cup: Historically the game between the two strongest international representative Teams, England and Scotland. (circa 1871-1899) The title is now given to an annual fixture involving one of rugby’s strongest nations helping to bring on a developing nation (England vs Scotland circa 2002)
Cap: Compulsory headgear bearing sponsor's logo worn at post-match interviews.
Conversion: The situation when a Scotsman remembers that he’s Scottish after he has been ignored by the All Black/Australian/South African/English selectors.
Disciplinary Panel: A meeting of between 2 and 3 former players who regularly convene in a Sky Sports studio in order to highlight incidents involving Leicester Tigers players that the referee failed to spot. They then pass sentence and the RFU are then obliged to carry out the punishment “in the interests of sport”. (See also: Trial by Media)
Free kick: The punishment for lying on the wrong side of a ruck of maul.
Grubber: Mistimed drop kick from anywhere on the field.
Goose step: Change in running style from a sprint to high kicking in order to slow down a defender only to sprint once defender has slowed down. First used by David Campese when, sprinting down the touchline, he saw dogsh*t lying in his path and tried to avoid getting his new boots dirty.
Laws: Rugby has laws, not rules; therefore it is that which you have to disobey in full view of the referee in order to be punished.
Maul: Free-for-all brawl where the ball is kept in the air. See ruck (1).
Offside Line: an imaginary line passing through a ball without puncturing it. Also, a line passing through a player's rearmost foot without causing injury. In theory, thise line may pass 5 metres behind a scrum or 10 metres behind a line-out, those these laws are rarely observed and never enforced.
Place kick: a defensive offensive tactic to prevent the scoring of tries. (At Welford Road, these commonly take place from within the attacking team’s own half)
Referee’s Assistant: The role that was often adopted by a Mr M. Dawson at Saints matches.
Ruck (1): Free-for-all brawl where the ball is placed on the ground. See maul.
Ruck (2): Accidental stepping on an opponent lying in an offside position.
Sidestep: a manoeuvre perfected by South African rugby administrators to avoid choosing coloured players.
Sinbin: a tactic used by some referees to increase their impact on the outcome of a game.
Trial by Media: The process by which Leicester players are singled out for committing acts of indiscipline that regularly go unpunished with all teams. This is often done purely “in the interests of fair-play”
Try: The verb used to describe what Scotland do every year in the Six Nations, often with little or no success.
Up-and-under: (an integral calculus term in rugby competitions) the inversion of global geographics - the southern hemisphere teams are usually ‘up’, while the northern hemisphere teams are usually ‘under’.
Wing (1): Northern hemisphere - extra defender.
Wing (2): Southern hemisphere - top try scorer.
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Stumbleupon06/07/2010 12:54
Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 2010:08:06:12:22:20 by Kat..
"Mark - if you can cleanly catch a ball kicked several hundred feet in the air within your own 22 metre line and call ‘mark’ while the entire other side is pounding towards you intent on doing you damage, you can have a free kick. You deserve it. "
Also allowed if you are physically still able to take the free kick where the entire other side arrived immediately you landed after catching the ball (see also: Mullered)
Penalty try: Further opportunity for aspirant disciplinary panel members to display their ignorance of the laws and/or the meaning of the word 'probably'.
Experimental Law Variations: Politically correct opportunity for the mentally impaired to mess around with the laws of the game (see 'Sky punditry panel').
Crouch, touch, pause, engage: Abject attempt to teach props choreography.
Sky Punditry Panel: Failed attempt to provide meaningful work for hopeless individuals, often former players (see Disciplinary panel).
It's a long time since Sports network paid anything!
Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 2010:07:06:14:47:08 by TonyTaff.
For further reference:
5m line. See Bath Rugby
Not releasing at the breakdown. See also Fathers for Justice
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2010:07:07:00:47:04 by MHG.
'south african' - see 'saracens'
'previous career' - useful insight into the alleged character of an individual who has transgressed rugby's moral code
'runner up' - see 'Northampton'
"Cynical professional foul" - identical action committed by anyone else
"man of the match" - almost invariably the fly half of whichever team won (unless he missed at least 3 kicks, in which case the no 8 gets it)
"drop out" - player who leaves the club in mid season
"numbers, numbers" - Oh no it's Jonathan Davies on commentary again
"good England Coach" - 53 seat motorised conveyance with a tasteful patriotic paint job
An entry that will hopefully be added soon.
Back in the dictionary..
'ineffectual' - see Rob Andrew
Scissors - implement used by Wuss fans to cut up their season tickets.
Ringfencing - something former England outside half John Horton wished existed in 1980.
Lazy - something message board experts accuse journos with when, in actual fact, they're thr lazy ones as they believe most of the crud written by the journos and still think it current years later.
Snobbery - the single most vile and hateful thing associated with our great game.
Sycophancy - once a wasp.... Nuff said.
Line out - departing Saints supporters on their way home from last season's GP final.
Delusion - any Wasps fan thinking the club has enough wedge to pay the wages, never mind build a new stadium.
Lock - something that desperately needs to be opened on the Sarries trophy cabinet.
Sidestep - Jim Mallinder when asked a question.
Dummy - see "Delusion"
Garryowen - former WBA and Man City footballer
Cerntre - the bit of the universe Saints fans believe is Franklin's Gardens
Five-eighth - 0.625
Who removed my H.R. Giger picture?
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2010:07:28:20:12:23 by large.
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